Bowel Cancer – Ben’s Story: “I went to the GP thinking I was completely wasting their time”

Ben was just 48 when he was diagnosed with bowel cancer in January this year. Fit, active, and busy running a family business teaching renovation and construction courses with his wife Kate, while raising their two sons aged 9 and 12, cancer was the last thing on his mind.

Over Christmas, while visiting family, Ben began to notice changes in his bowel habits. He found he needed to go to the toilet more frequently and occasionally noticed a small amount of blood and mucus in his poo, but he put it down to a change in diet and Christmas indulgence.

“I thought the colour of the blood was quite light red, it wasn’t dark and there was hardly any of it, so I didn’t think it was anything to worry about,” Ben explains. “I just assumed it was something I’d eaten, or maybe piles.”

Kate remembers one particular day that made them realise something wasn’t right, while they were taking a trip out to see some Christmas lights. “Ben didn’t want to go because he needed to stay close to a toilet, we had to make an emergency stop at the petrol station and the rest of the day was just Ben wanting to get home.”

Another day, while playing laser tag with family, Ben suddenly had an urgent need for the toilet, this time passing large amounts of mucus.

“That was when I thought, something definitely isn’t right,” he says. “But I still put it down to eating badly over Christmas. I went to the GP thinking I was completely wasting their time.”

At the GP appointment, Ben talked through his symptoms and was given a FIT (faecal immunochemical test) to take home. When the results came back, they were only just over the threshold for referral.

“I still thought everything would be fine,” Ben says. “I felt a bit stupid for causing a fuss and didn’t really think I needed to be there.”

Ben was referred for a colonoscopy. On the day of the procedure, Kate was out collecting the children and planned to pick Ben up afterwards. During the test, Ben watched the screen and everything initially appeared normal.

“They kept asking when Kate would be back, and I thought they just meant to collect me,” Ben says. “It didn’t even register that it could be cancer.”

When Kate arrived, she was asked to join Ben in a consultation room while someone sat with their youngest son.

“They told us they’d found a tumour and had seen enough to know it was cancerous,” Ben says. “They said I would need surgery and a stoma. It felt like the floor opened up, I was in complete shock.”

Ben’s biggest fear was that the cancer might have spread. “The worst thought was thinking I might be leaving my family behind to deal with everything on their own,” he says.

Ben was diagnosed on Tuesday 20^th January. They told their children that weekend, and just four weeks later, Ben underwent surgery to have the tumour removed on the 16^th February.

“It all happened much quicker than we expected,” Kate says. “That was a relief because it gave us less time to worry but it was stressful trying to sort out work and finances so suddenly.”

Scans before surgery showed no signs that the cancer had spread, which brought enormous relief. “As soon as I knew that, it felt like nothing else mattered,” Ben says. “All I had to do was turn up, let the doctors do their job and focus on healing.”

Following surgery, doctors confirmed the tumour had been completely removed. After a week in hospital, Ben was finally back home, but recovery wasn’t without its challenges. Ben had to adjust to living with a stoma and learn what he could and couldn’t eat. There were some difficult moments, including one emergency return to hospital when he was in severe pain and hadn’t passed anything for two days.

“But now things are really positive,” Ben says. Remarkably, Ben was back at work just three weeks after surgery, and four weeks after surgery he returned to Brazilian jiu-jitsu – a sport that plays a big part in his life.

“I first went back just to say hello,” Ben says. “My family and friends have been incredible, but the support from the jiu-jitsu community really surprised me. Four weeks to the day after surgery, I was fully back. Everyone was careful with me, but it was brilliant.”

Ben’s stoma is temporary, and he is now on the waiting list for reversal. Kate says one of the hardest parts has been managing the practical side of life after surgery.

“Ben manages the stoma itself really well,” she explains, “but the admin around it has been incredibly difficult – prescriptions, supplies, trying different products. If someone didn’t have support, it would be so stressful. You’re given the impression when you leave hospital that it will all be easy, but it really isn’t.”

Now, Ben and Kate are passionate about raising awareness.

“We talk to our family about being healthier, stopping smoking and listening to your body,” Kate says. “But the biggest impact has been with our students.”

The couple teach around 400 students a year and have been open about Ben’s diagnosis, encouraging others to check their symptoms and seek help. Their newsletters now regularly include bowel cancer information.

“When people see that we’re comfortable talking about it, it opens the door,” Kate explains. “They start having conversations they might not have otherwise had.”

Ben hopes his story encourages others not to delay.

“People don’t talk about bowel cancer,” he says. “If you found a lump in your breast, you’d get it checked. But if something’s going on ‘down there’, it’s easy to explain it away – bad diet, stress, getting older. I did exactly that.”

Both Ben and Kate agree that seeing real patient stories helped them navigate diagnosis and recovery. “Hearing real people talk honestly, not just in glossy brochures, made a huge difference,” Ben says.

Bowel cancer doesn’t always cause obvious or severe symptoms. Many of the signs are easy to explain away, especially if they come and go. But if you notice any changes that are unusual for you and don’t go away, it’s important to speak to your GP.

Possible symptoms of bowel cancer include:

• A change in your normal bowel habits (going more or less often, looser poo, diarrhoea or constipation that isn’t usual for you)
• Blood in your poo (even a small amount, or blood that looks light red)
• Mucus in your poo
• A feeling that your bowel doesn’t fully empty after going to the toilet
• Needing to rush to the toilet or struggling to control bowel movements
• Persistent stomach pain, cramping, bloating or discomfort
• Unexplained weight loss
• Ongoing tiredness or fatigue with no clear reason

More information on the signs and symptoms of bowel cancer can be found at Signs and symptoms of bowel cancer | Bowel Cancer UK

You don’t need to have all these symptoms – having just one can be enough to get checked.

“If something changes, don’t ignore it. Trust your instincts and go to your GP. It might feel awkward or inconvenient, and you might worry about wasting someone’s time, but getting checked could save your life,” says Ben.

In England, everyone aged 50 to 74 is invited to take part in bowel cancer screening. Every two years, you’ll be sent a bowel screening test (FIT test) through the post to complete at home and send back for testing.

The test looks for tiny traces of blood in your poo that you might not be able to see, helping detect bowel cancer at an early stage, often before symptoms appear. Find out more about bowel cancer screening: Bowel cancer screening – NHS

If you’re sent a screening test, it’s really important to complete it and send it back.

But screening isn’t the whole story. Ben was diagnosed with bowel cancer at 48, before he was eligible for routine screening. His story is a reminder that bowel cancer can affect people of all ages, not just those over 50.

If you’re under 50, you won’t automatically be invited for screening, which makes it even more important to notice changes in your body and speak to your GP if something doesn’t feel right.

Know the symptoms. Do your screening. Get checked.